Today's article is the fourth in a 5-part series in which I share the ten most common mistakes I see first-time CTOs make and ways to avoid them.

If you found this article and would like to read the series in order of publication, jump to the bottom of the page, where you'll find a link to the previous articles.

Today's mistakes examine common issues with ego getting in the way, making us believe we must have all the answers to prove our worth.

I hope you'll find this helpful and actionable.

Let's get started!

#7 Trying to be the person with all the answers

At this level in the organization, you're not supposed to have up-to-date information on everything happening at every moment or know how to fix every issue your team faces.

It's OK sometimes to answer “I don't know" when a peer in the executive team or a member of the tech organization asks you a question.

People don't expect you to have all the answers, but they'll hold you accountable for finding them eventually.

To overcome the fear of looking incompetent by saying I don't know, combine it with a commitment to finding the answer and taking action to follow up. As you do this consistently, people will develop a lot of respect for your professionalism.

For example, when facing a question from a peer for which you don't think you have all the details, you can say I don't know, but I'll check with the team, and I'll get back to you by tomorrow's EOD. Then, take note of the action, follow up with the team, and get back to the person within the agreed-upon time frame.

There is no shame in recognizing that our knowledge is limited and accepting that things on the ground can move faster than you can keep up with.

Normalize the acceptance of partial knowledge and make it a starting point of an investigation rather than the final point of an awkward conversation.

#8 Not asking for help.

Being in the C-suite can be a lonely journey. Your peers are not experts in the same domain as you are, and you don't feel comfortable asking for help from other team members.

You might feel a stronger resistance to asking for help based on the environment you grew up in, especially in cultures where the overconfident alpha male types tend to be admired.

There is one thing that will help you get rid of those old beliefs about asking for help.

Asking for help is a powerful way to build trust with people.¹

When you ask people for help, you're signaling two things:

1. You are vulnerable and, therefore, human. We tend to relate better with people who are up-front about their shortcomings. We feel less inclined to keep up with an image of perfection and become immediately more comfortable in the relationship.

2. You value the person's judgment. Otherwise, you would not be asking them for help. Think about how you feel when someone reaches out to you asking for your opinion or support on a difficult challenge they're going through. You feel honored and hold them in high regard as a consequence.

If finding someone to ask for help within your organization can be challenging, you can consider other options.

The first one is to reach out to fellow practitioners. Find Slack communities and meetups, or contact people you know and exchange ideas with them.

The second one is to engage the support of a professional mentor and coach, someone who has gone through similar pains and who can help you gain more clarity on your role and course of action.

I wrote an article on the merits of mentoring. You can find it here if you want to know more about my views on the topic.

Today, I described two more of the ten most common mistakes I've seen first-time CTOs make.

Your situation might resonate with some of them, and you might struggle with other aspects I didn't cover here.

Each case is different, and generalization can help us start thinking about our case from an outside perspective.

I hope you enjoyed today's article.

See you next week!

Previous articles in the series

If you want to read the previous article in this series, you'll find them here.

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